Correct energy, consistent structure and clear direction are key when working to build a strong bond with our dogs and cement their understanding of their role within the pack. A lack thereof will more likely than not result in our dog assuming leadership themselves, which can manifest as undesirable behaviours ranging from leash-pulling to aggression.
If we want our dog to be the ideal pack member, we must first check in with ourselves as pack leaders, making sure we are being what we want from our dog and transferring the correct energy for them to reflect. We often create tension and confusion by expecting our dogs to understand verbal commands using verbal language as we do, and overlook body language and energy which dogs instinctually use to communicate. Regardless of the words we say to our dogs, if we are projecting excitement and/or anxiety through our demeanor our dogs will pick up on it. Likewise, when we are calm and assertive, our dog will naturally gravitate toward us, align with our energy and become more susceptible to direction.
As we all know, dogs are pack animals, but we often forget the strict hierarchical structures they follow, furthering confusion as they receive muddled discipline and affection from us when on the boundaries of acceptable behaviour. If we are not clear each and every time our dog pushes these boundaries, their misbehaviour will only grow with each instance as they test us to see what they can get away with.
Similarly, with each command we give our dog, we must mean it to the point where we will make it happen each and every time. If we are not disciplined and do not follow through with making sure our commands our met, our dogs will not respect them and the fault for this lies with us, not them.
An example of this would be my German Shepherd Millie as although I believe she loves me, she ultimately respects my position in our pack as I give her balanced affection and opportunity to express her drives while consistently following our structure and enforcing its rules and it’s this that she loves, giving way to our amazing relationship. My mother, on the other hand, would also like to believe that Millie loves her as she becomes excited when seeing her, as my mother always greets Millie with high energy and a treat but no structure. The major difference here is when my mother tries to be assertive, Millie simply gives her a look and either turns away or continues with what she was doing as she doesn’t have the respect of a pack leader. I can then calmly give Millie the same command and she’ll do it first time. This isn’t from being trained to listen to me and not my mother, Millie knows full well what is being asked of her by both of us with the same command, it’s that, on one hand, she has incorrect energy and no structure and on the other correct energy and consistent structure.
So when working on building a bond with your dog, ask yourself are you being a real pack leader or are you being like my mother? The latter of which is fine, until you need the dog to do something...